A Family Friend Shares his Story on how Art became Therapeutic
Watercolour Painting: Refuge for the Mind and Spirit
I am not an artist… I graduated in 2005 with my Bachelor of Business Administration and entered the workforce shortly after. This is when the bouts of depression and anxiety really kicked in. Every single “career” job that I have had has ended with my burning out and leaving unexpectedly and unwantedly. My bosses have all wondered why I was leaving, as they were all quite happy with my performance. What they didn’t know was that I was dying on the inside every day that I stepped into the office. I felt like a fraud, like I wasn’t good enough, like I was a giant failure, and like I was letting everyone down around me on a constant basis.
So, here I am today. Now possessing a Master of Business Administration, three more jobs have come and gone, and the depression and anxiety is worse than ever. Having two young children aged two and 10 months have exasperated the anxiety levels as there just happens to be more on the table than ever before. This has resulted in me being off on sick leave from my current job as an administrator for a public institution for the past four months and counting. Something that I am not proud of, nor used to doing. The time came for me to really explore different avenues to deal with the anxiety and depression symptoms.
I tried many different treatments to cope including psychotherapy, medications, exercise, diet, naturopathy, natural medicine, meditation, and other “out there” methods to learn how to calm my mind and get a better perspective on life. Most recently I have dabbled in furniture restoration, home renovations, and painting with watercolours as therapeutic exercises, which have all been very effective during my recovery. Specifically though, painting seems to be the most effective for me at this time.
Painting offers me a refuge from my over-active mind. It allows me to give my brain a very specific task to do what it wants within a 9”x12” rectangle and a small colour pallet. Painting allows me to give myself the right to create, without anyone’s (including my own) judgement or critique.
For a short period of time, I can create whatever I want! This acts as a very meditative experience for me, where my mind is focused on the present moment for an extended period, blocking out the negative thoughts and feelings that depression and anxiety bring on. This, I believe, assists with the recovery of an over-active mind that is usually busy bashing myself or catastrophizing the future. While painting, my mind is pre-occupied with an enjoyable, relaxing, stress-free, AND productive task. I believe that having a feeling of being able to complete a task without anxiety helps re-wire the brain to expect a positive outcome while working in a calm and relaxing way. This is in stark contrast to my usual thoughts and feelings when tackling most work and daily life tasks.
Now, I am not claiming to be anywhere near good at painting, but that isn’t the point. In fact, the point is not to become good at it at all. Rather, the point is to use the time to heal the mind and spirit though a creative experience. If you happen to become Picasso along the way, well then you have found your calling. If you happen to become your healthy self along the way, well then you’ve found everything.